


Stuck In Your Head

by AdumbDryer



Category: Logan Lucky (2017)
Genre: Author cant keep it in her pants, Clyde's a Sweet Heart, Eventual Smut to Come, F/M, Imma drag this out as much as I can, Probably a lot of tension, Readers got Problems, bed sharing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-24
Updated: 2018-09-29
Packaged: 2019-03-23 05:09:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 20,499
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13780386
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AdumbDryer/pseuds/AdumbDryer
Summary: You just lost your job and your husband wants a divorce. Wracked with stress and anxiety you drive off, leaving your life behind. After coming across a bar for a stiff drink, you meet a sweet man who helps you sort out the stress in your life.





	1. Chapter 1

Heavy rain falls on your windshield as you drive along the highway. The windshield wipers on your car seriously need to be replaced so the blurred view of the highway during this time of night makes it much more difficult to see. You don't particularly know where you're driving to but you know it just needs to be...away. You took a deep breath, focusing on the air filling your lungs and trying to keep it together. Come on it's okay you'll be fine you tell yourself, but you could really use a drink. Something strong to finally calm your anxiety that's been building up. 

You exit the highway and pull up to a rather interesting looking bar, with neon lights blaring the words Duck Tape, breaking up the darkness of the night sky. You brace yourself before getting out of the car. it's not that you don't feel safe, but there's constant nagging in the back of your mind that something's wrong. It's just the anxiety you think to yourself, even if something happens, it's not like you have much else to lose.  
Rushing to the entrance to avoid the rain, you throw open the door and walk inside. The setting is not much different from other bars that you've seen in the past. Tv, old worn bar stools, music softly playing but something here in the atmosphere feels a little different. It's warmer here, a nice contrast to the heavy downpour outside and your anxiety begins to soothe, just a bit. 

There was a total of only 3 customers in the bar, which is surprising given that's its a Friday night. Makes you wonder about the quality of the drinks here. You keep your head down and trudge over to a spot at the counter that was far away from the other patrons, trying to avoid human interaction. it's for the best right now you reason with yourself. You have too much on your mind to be as social and outgoing as you normally were. You stare blankly at the countertop, numb. how did all this happen? In the mere span of a couple days, your life has been completely turned upside down. A loving husband and a comfortable job, Everything was going so well for, but of course, all good things have to come to an end….  
“What can I get for ya?” a deep, rumbling voice interrupts your train of thought, visibly startling you. Your eyes shoot up immediately and are met with dark honey brown eyes, blinking.  
Oh, the bartender  
“Uhm..” you think to yourself, looking over at the stock of alcohol behind him, you quickly trying to think of something to drink, but you eventually just take a deep sigh and resign, “whatever you have that's strong” 

He chuckles lightly and says, “comin’ right up”  
You try to shake the negative thoughts away and focus on grounding yourself, so you look over at the bartender and watch him make your drink.  
You notice that the bartender is actually very handsome. Something you didn't pay attention to at first, being too focused on your own crumbling state of being. Long Dark hair frames an angular jawline that though, soft, was still very enticing. You can't help but notice his soft doe eyes and pink Plush lips, nested beneath the dark facial hair. He’s also well built, thick muscle that makes your mouth water a bit. You wonder what it would feel like to have such a solid build pressed up against your body. He's really Tall as well. You can't help but stare. His looks are rather unconventional but Something about him draws you in, you haven't felt this taken aback by someone since you met your husband-

No. Ex-Husband.  
Anger and jealousy flare up but you try to shake it off. He's not here anymore. You've traveled far far away from him and you are both much happier without each other. Yo try to push those thoughts aside and focus back on the bartender. His movements are fluid and comfortable as he makes your drink and...  
wait..is he making your drink with one arm?  
You lean over to see a nude colored prosthetic resting on the bar countertop beside him. He seems to be missing his left hand.  
So He's got a story too...  
Your eyes begin to wander from the drink to his figure a little more. You can tell He’s got a nice ass through those dark denim jeans and you find yourself wondering what it would be like to sit in his lap, brush your fingers through his hair, kiss those pretty lips. You bite your own lip. Come on, girl you shouldn't be thinking such things about a man who you've barely spoken to. Show some respect. Your eyes drift back up to his face and you realize that he's been looking back at you. 

You turn your head away, face flushed with embarrassment. A blush spreads across his cheeks too as he walks back over to you and slides your drink across the counter.  
“Here Ya go, honey,” He says casually.  
Honey? Your face heats up even more. He must say that to everyone. And he's got a southern accent too? Jesus Christ  
“Thank you” you smile, grab the drink and bring it to your lips, sweet and strong. You can feel your nerves relax more as you close your eyes and just enjoy the taste of the alcohol as it slightly burns going down. 

You open them to see the bartender still lingering by you, not particularly sure what to do next.  
“This is really good,” you say to him. You've never really been the one for super fruity flavored concoctions, but you still like a sweet taste, so this fit you very well.  
“Thank you” he smiled,”you didn't particularly strike me as someone who liked somethin’ too sweet but still sweet enough to keep it interestin’’  
You smile. Interesting.  
“ Well you clearly can read customers very well cause you're spot on,” you said with a chuckle. He laughed softly, looking down at the countertop briefly. When he looked back up your eyes met and you felt a shock of heat spread through your body. His eyes are so beautiful you can't help but just stare. You see His eyes trail down to your lips and he bites down on his own. Ok, so this attraction may not be one-sided. An interesting revelation.  
The electricity between you tow becomes almost unbearable in the best way possible, that is until a patron from across the bar tries to signal the bartender's attention. 

He breaks eye contact and mumbles a small “ excuse me Hun” walking over to the opposite side of the bar.  
You’re left again with your thoughts, staring down at the dark, swirling liquid in your glass. You begin to space out, remembering all that has happened to you in this past week. Anxiety spikes as you begin to realize that you don't know what you're even doing, where you're even going, or what your next move is. You've just been driving to get away from your problems and ended up in the middle of bumfuck nowhere. You don't have a job anymore, not after getting suddenly fired in the company's string of budget cuts. What the hell are you gonna do? 

“I hope I'm not out of line, but I can't help but notice that something seems to really be botherin’ you.” The bartenders back, giving you a sympathetic look. He looks almost innocent. You don't really want to share, but he seems so safe and trustworthy, maybe confiding in someone would help. You've been very lonely lately. 

You gave a deep sigh,“I spent my entire life following this rigid plan, go to school, get a degree, get a job, fall in love and Just like that, in an instant, everything fell apart.” staring at your glass, you look up to see him listening intently, like he's hanging on to every word you say.  
“What happened? ” he asked  
“Well, in the span of two days I was fired, told to collect all my things, and then was sat down by my husband of 5 years and told that he was unhappy with our marriage, and that we should get divorced.” You put it so bluntly just to avoid the raw pain that emerged with the memories, still so fresh. “ I eventually snapped, said ‘fuck it’, packed up my stuff and drove away. Starting to regret it though.” 

“Why?” he asked  
“Well,” taking a deep sigh, trying to keep the anxiety at bay, “ Because I don't know what the hell I'm doing. I spent my entire life following a plan to success that's supposed to work and now that the plan has fallen apart, I don't know where I'm going or when I'm gonna be able to get another job. I just ….feel so alone” the realization shakes you to your core. You sit in silence for a bit before the bartender eventually breaks it. 

“Well, I don't want you feelin’ so lonely on such a nice night,” he says looking out the window to see the heavy rain crashing down. “ Hi, I’m Clyde Logan. Nice to meet you.” He reaches out to shake your hand. You let out a small laugh as you shake his, enjoying the warmth of his hand.  
You both talk and open up about your lives to each other, he tells you about the story behind him losing his hand. Serving in the military, on the way home from Iraq when a bomber attacked, taking his hand with them. He believes his family’s got a lot of bad luck, and from what he's telling you, it seems to be true. Despite the tragedy, he’s very funny and genuine and You can't help but open up more about your life, telling him about how your family was very uptight and proper, refusing to let you explore creative interests outside of what they wanted. 

At about 1 am you realize you've been here talking with him for a long time. The bar at this point is deserted. With the other customers leaving hours earlier.  
“ Having your life scattered like that is hard so you should be focusin’ on right now is taking it one day at a time.” He paused. Then, “ Do you have a place to stay tonight?” he asked. 

“ Not particularly, I was gonna go to a Motel nearby but I uhm...lost track of time,” you respond, blushing a bit, He was just so cute, you couldn't help but get distracted.  
“ the only place nearby is just an old motel 6 and they charge too much for what they're givin’ ya..” he starts. You feel a smile grow on your face, having a small clue as to what he's gonna say next, you just wanna hear him ask.  
“If you don't mind my boldness, you could stay at my place tonight. It's not much but if you don't have a job yet, Motel 6 is gonna drain your savings. I could show you around also, maybe help you find a new job, I-I know Carl down at our local hardware store is lookin' for new associates, hell I might even need some help around here..” he was babbling and he knew it, but he couldn't stop. You laugh softly, cutting him off “ That would be wonderful Clyde, thank you.”  
He grins, “ Ok then I'll just need to close up real quick and then we can head home.”  
You help him wipe down tables and lift chairs onto the counter, closing everything up. It's 2 am by the time you guys get back to his trailer. 

As he shows you around his place, Clyde becomes hyper-aware of his surroundings. “I know it ain't much but it's my home.” he justifies, cleaning off the coffee table of beer cans quickly.  
“This is nice Clyde,” you say looking around, taking in the decorations of his home. You turn around to look at him, “ Thank you” you say softly.  
“Well I couldn't leave a pretty young gal such as yourself out in the rain could I?” He joked before realizing what he had said. Eyes wide, he stammered, “.. I mean that’d be- I wouldn't- I um..” He looked down defeated, blush spreading across his cheeks. You giggle, How is he so cute? “really, Clyde I mean it. thank you” you say before going on the tip of your toes to press a chaste kiss to his cheek. The blush he had before now gone, and replaced with wide eyes and a beet red face. 

“Well then,” you announce clapping your hands together and visibly startling Clyde,“ let's get to bed, shall we? I'm tired as hell.”  
“Oh. Um yeah” scratching the top of his head he leads you to his bedroom.  
“ so you can sleep here, I can take the couch,” he says, pointing to the bed.  
“No no no you don't have to do that. I can take the couch. I don't want to have to kick you out of your own bed.” you reason.  
He laughed softly,” It's alright sweetheart. I don't mind.”  
“Come on, you can just sleep with me?” you suggest, raising an eyebrow. He's so solid and big. you wonder what it feels like to rest your head on his chest. He's probably super warm too, which would be a nice change for once from constantly being cold at night, even when you slept with your husband.  
He looks at you, a little shocked.  
“Is that...somethin’ that you ..would want?” he asks tentatively.  
Giving him a warm smile, “ yes, I insist.”  
“Ok I won't do anything you wouldn't like” he promises. 

He lends you one of his shirts and leaves the room to give you some privacy to change. The shirt is soft and feels nice against your skin. It's way too big on you, falling off of one of your shoulders and covering your ass, which is for the best because you're wearing a rather revealing pair of panties. Clyde walks back in as you lay down on his bed, the look in his eyes when he sees you on his own bed is dark, almost predatory. But he's so clearly doing his best to hold back his urges to grab you and kiss you hard, trying desperately to be a gentleman. The last thing he wants to do is make you feel uncomfortable. You've been through too much lately, and he doesn't want to add to the stress that you are already dealing with. You roll over and take the right side of the bed, and he takes the left, removing his prosthetic in the process and setting it on the bedside table. 

Lying down like this with him, you wonder to yourself, what if he does make a move? Would you fight it? He looks so innocent and sweet, but you can tell that under the mannerisms and the pet names that he can completely wreck you. What would it be like? Having his hand drift slowly over to your hip, sliding back to touch your ass, his breath on your neck. Feeling his erection rub up against you as he growls, “baby girl” in your ear. 

You find yourself getting turned on a little too quick at the idea so you shut it down quickly. This man had been very nice to you, helping you talk about your troubles, offering you a place to stay, and even offering to show you around the town. Thinking of him in such a dirty manner is rude, and right beside him no less. Come on. You're not sure if you want to stay in this town, but Clyde is so sweet and open, he is certainly making you consider it. Despite your carefulness around him, You feel yourself scooching over. Turns out you were right, he is really warm. You're not sure if he's completely asleep yet but you snuggle into his side to steal some of his warmth, settling your head in the crook of his neck. You eventually feel yourself drift off to sleep with the thought of Clyde on your mind.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tension begins to rise between you and Clyde in the best way possible.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mostly more fluff in this one. If you squint you can see some plot addition and most important of all..ya girl learned how to italicize.

The beaming ray of sunshine on your face woke you up the next morning. Eyes still closed, you stirred softly. You were so warm and comfortable in that moment and you didn't want it to end. As the lingering sleep fades, you become more aware of your surroundings. You open your eyes to a room that was neither yours nor a Hotel’s and you begin reeling.

What happened the night before?

You realize that there’s another person in the bed beside you, loosely pressed up against you, steadily snoring at the base of your neck. There's also a thick arm slung around your waist as well as the heavy press of an erection at your lower back.

_Well hello there._

You lift your head and look around, spotting a prosthetic arm resting on the bedside drawer and it dawns on you. Clyde, the bartender. The sweet, and very _very_ hot, bartender from the bar the night before. He offered you a place to stay for the night and you accepted, and foolishly asked him to sleep with you.

He's still in a heavy sleep if the snoring is any indicator, so you try to stay still. After a while though, you begin to feel restless, and the erection pressing against you doesn't seem to be fleeting anytime soon. You reach over to the bedside drawer to grab your phone from your purse, checking the time and seeing if anyone had messaged you. No one did. Of course. You'd at least had hoped that your family would care about you leaving so suddenly, but that hope has begun to fizzle.

You try to reason with yourself when a small grunt comes from behind you. Clyde’s hand on your waist slowly slides down, resting on your hip and you feel the heavy weight behind you press closer. His hips thrust lazily, sliding his hard-on up and down against your ass and a twinge of arousal shoots through you. A burning heat that has been slowly building up inside you since you first met the man.

“Mmmm” he hums contently and a small whimper escapes your throat. You don't really know what to do, but you definitely don't want it to stop. He smells so good, a musky, spicy scent that is such a typical _man_ scent. You take a deep breath. His hand caressing your hip feels nice too. It's so soft, and so big.

_And clearly that's not the only thing that's big on him too._

Biting your lip, Your thoughts go in all sorts of different, rather dirty directions. You were stuck between wanting to remain respectful to him, and wanting him to fuck you up against a wall.

To be fair though, He started it with his morning wood so...

Clyde suddenly shoots up and looks over at you. You were planning on pretending to be asleep when he fully wakes up but he caught you off guard so all you could do was stare at him with wide eyes. “You alright?” you say, slight smirk on your lips. “Um”, he hesitates, looking down into his lap, “ yeah I-I'm alrigh’ I just gotta…” he gets up and out of the bed, quickly grabs his prosthetic and scurries over to the bathroom, a tent clear in his boxers.

You watch him go, amused but slightly disappointed. You're not sure what you wanted in that moment, but now you had hoped a little that Clyde would have maybe made a move. You get out of his bed and start stretching and Clyde comes out of the bathroom behind you. He managed to calm himself down enough to not look like a horny little boy in a girls locker room but stops dead in his tracks when he sees you stretching.

Your arms out in the air, feeling the muscles stretch and your bones crack. His shirt barely covers your body and your ass is practically on display for him, lacy panties and all. He stands there, watching you hungrily. You heard him hiss a “Jesus Christ” under his breath and can't help but giggle a little. You can feel his eyes on you but you don't want to turn around, Enjoying the tension between you two.

“I’m gonna get some breakfast started.” he announced, quickly turning around and leaving, closing the door behind him. You sit and think to yourself.

Should you change back into your clothes from last night? Should you go out to your car and get your clean clothes? Or should you just walk out in his shirt and watch him suffer? The thought of it makes you laugh. He’s still in his boxers to be fair. Going out to the car sounds too difficult and you kind of wanna see where this goes. But what is exactly this? He clearly doesn't have a girlfriend. No faithful man in a relationship would invite a lady to stay over. He seems interested in you, and not just a “one night stand” situation. That would have already happened if that was the case.

Maybe he really...doesn't like you and he’s just trying to be nice. You realize how pathetic you probably looked last night. Rained on, messy hair, and shaky hands. He probably felt like he _needed_ to take care of you. What if he just wants you to leave? your mood begins to plummet and you feel yourself getting anxious. You're thinking too hard and you know it. You push your thoughts away and decide to just go out in his shirt. You’d rather die than put on jeans at 9 in the morning And if he was so uncomfortable, you hope he'd at least say something.

Seeing him so flustered like that makes you want to be bolder, hoping that he would eventually break and just take you. You walk out to the kitchen and immediately get hit with the smell of bacon. You feel your stomach growling immediately and _wow_ does that smell good. You walk over and sit by the table, watching Clyde cook. You offer to help, but he refused to let you interfere,

“It’s alright darlin’. I can make it. It’ll be done in just a minute.” Clyde walks over, sets a plate full of delicious looking eggs, bacon and toast on the table and sits on the chair across from you. He pours you a glass of orange juice and you can't help but feel so grateful.

“Thank you Clyde. This all is really sweet of you” you say to him.

He smiles, “ No problem hun, hope you don't mind the bacon bein’ a lil’ burnt though”

“I don't mind, I actually prefer it that way.” You chuckle, biting into a slice.

As you two eat, you both make small talk, but something seems to be on Clydes mind judging from the stiff way he’s eating. There a comfortable silence until he eventually breaks it.

“Sorry about my… uh...indecency this mornin’” he apologizes, looking down. You couldn't help but grin. He looked like a little boy who got caught with his hand in the cookie jar rather than a grown man who got hard while sharing a bed with a woman.

“ It’s just y’know… I haven't really been with a lady in a while and the...um...friction got to me.” he explained, still looking so ashamed and guilty.

“The friction huh?” you say, raising your eyebrow. “It’s alright I didn't really notice it.”

He pauses eating and looks at you, a smile tugging at his lips.

You go red in the face, “ I mean...not like that cause like I-I did y’know like feel it. I don't mean that your di- its like small because its not but…shit wait like-”

you get interrupted by Clyde’s hearty laugh and it's just so adorable, You can't help but laugh too. You don't remember the last time you were this comfortable with someone.

“ I'm not really one to talk though...with my stretching and all…” you mumble. Looking up from your glass of juice. He looked at you with a grin spread on his face.

“ Yeah. I didn't mind the show, but uh” he hesitated, biting his lip “ it did make my situation a little...harder.”

You burst out laughing again and he joined, clearly proud of his pun.

“ So we’re even then?”

“ Yeah” he chuckled, “ We’re even.”

You two finish up breakfast and you offer to clean the dishes. But as you wipe down the table and clean off the plates, you can't help but wonder whether you should leave or stay with him. The all too familiar _what the hell am I doing_ thought floats into your head and once again you're struck with nerves. If you leave, you're probably not gonna come back and you'll just drive to another town with more random people who you don't know and be back to square one.

“Y’know” Clyde starts, suddenly appearing behind you, “ I’m planning on meeting with my brother and sister today at the local fair. Ya wanna come along? Then maybe after that we could look around for a job for you or a place to stay because don't get me wrong, I like you stayin’ here but you’ll have to keep dealin’ with my ‘indecency’ more”

_God_ , it's almost as if he knows what you're thinking. You couldn't help but feel so happy that he’s actually making an effort to help you. At such a vulnerable state, it's so nice to have someone giving you direction when you feel so lost. When you were with your husband, you felt like you had to be the one to put in all the effort and it really ran you down. And even in the end, he _still_ wasn't happy. You suddenly feel so lucky that you took that exit and walked into Duck Tape, knowing that if you hadn't met Clyde, you would be alone, breaking down in your car.

You turn around to look at him and _oh_ he's a lot closer to you than you expected. “Y-yeah that would be wonderful. I don't remember the last time I had gone to a fair, and I would love to meet your family,” You briefly remember him mentioning he had a brother and sister while you two were at the bar the night before. “I honestly don't think I’ll have a hard time finding a job, I just need to start applying. I know I for sure need to find a place soon, but you might have to deal with me for a couple of days”

“ It's not urgent, and if all else fails you can just work at the bar with me” he said, smirking.

You look into his eyes, they're so gorgeous, with small specks of gold that make them seem so expressive, gentle.

“I know I keep saying Thank you Clyde, but...thank you. What you're doing for me is so nice and thoughtful i just…” you find yourself having a hard time speaking, throat tightening up. You take a deep breath and look down.“I’m just glad that I met you.”

After a long silence you look back up to see him staring intently at you. A blush had spread across his cheeks, but he almost looks...sad. He slowly walks closer to you, closing the gap and embracing you in a giant bear hug. He's so warm and he smells so good, you wrap your arms around him and squeeze, letting him hold you. You hear him mumble “ I’m glad I met you too.” into your ear and you're so happy that your heart could burst. You don't know how long you guys had hugged but all you know that it was too short. You just want to bury your face in his chest and stay there for a while.

“C’mon, let's go get ready for the fair,” he says. You both walk toward the bedroom when you ask, “How long do we have till we have to leave?”

“Not sure, maybe a hour. Hour n’a half. Why?” he replies.

“Cause that breakfast was so good and I'm so full, I just wanna go back to sleep.” you say, stretching out your arms.

He looks you up and down and chuckles, “ Well, I wouldn't mind a small Post Breakfast Nap before we leave.”

He follows you back into the bedroom, taking off his prosthetic and collapsing on the bed with you. Both of you snuggle into each other, pulling up the blanket and just enjoying each other’s presence. He begins to run his fingers through your hair and you feel like you're in heaven. You shift and rest your head on his chest and begin to drift off to sleep, feeling so content and happy that you met such a wonderful man.

Clyde though, has a hard time falling asleep. His thoughts still racing with fear. He hopes that he can get you back on your feet before his brother’s plan puts him in jail. He can't imagine what you’ll think of him when it happens. He never told you about his time in juvie because he was worried what you'd think but Youre so sweet and greatful and hot. He’s truly glad that he met you but he wishes it was at a different time. He finds himself already mourning your relationship before it’s even started and resenting Jimmy for having him do this, but he understands that its necessary for the plan and when it's all over, he hopes he’ll still have a chance with you. But for now, he wraps his arms around you, closes his eyes, and cherises the time you spend with him.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I swear theres some form of a storyline here. Was having a bit of a hard time writing this chapter but HERE IT IS  
> p.s sorry its pretty dialogue heavy

 

The heat of the sunlight beams down on your back, and the dry grass crunches as you and Clyde walk through the county fair. You and Clyde both woke up at his place in a panic before realizing that you both still had some time to get ready to go.

 

You weren't actually tired when you suggested the nap, you were really just dying to get closer to Clyde again, but the moment you hit the bed, you were gone. Feeling the weight of him pressed against you as he holds you was such a nice and soothing sensation, you wish you could've stayed in that moment forever. But you two eventually rushed to get ready and out of the trailer to head over to the lively fair. 

 

The buzz of entertainment distracts you as you walk and you can't help but smile at all the families playing and having fun. The upbeat music played throughout the fair puts you in a relatively good mood. 

 

As you stroll, You get caught up watching a man congratulate his son on winning a carnival game, hugging him close. Their warm smiles and loving embrace makes you feel a bittersweet sensation. You realize that you always imagined you and your family coming to a county fair just like this and spending time with each other. A pang of sadness hits you deep in your heart as your mind immediately goes to your ex-husband, thinking about what could have been. 

Maybe one day. 

“You alright darlin’?” Clyde says looking over at you, concerned. 

You turned around to look at him and he looks so worried, almost as if he thinks you're gonna up and run away from him. 

“Yeah I’m-I’m okay.” giving him a smile,  you clear your throat and continue to walk with him. 

As you two continue to walk, You find yourself getting the urge to hold his hand. You always loved to hold hands, it's such a gentle and sweet display of affection to others, letting them know that he's yours. 

_ But he's not yours  _

The thought catches you off guard. Maybe not, but judging from the way Clyde looks at you, he could be. You're not sure how Clyde would react, but at this point, there's no reason to not take a chance. With the slight swinging of your arms as you walk, you keep finding your own hand bumping into his prosthetic one, so you get an idea. 

You timidly reach over to his prosthetic and grab onto it as if you were holding onto his good hand, cradling the plastic. 

Clyde doesn't notice at first and you begin to feel stupid, but he feels a slight tug eventually and looks down. His head shoots up to look at you, surprised. 

“I-is this okay?” you're afraid that you may have made him feel insecure about his hand. 

That fear melts away when his look of surprise melts into a warm smile and he lets out a small chuckle. 

“Yeah, Ya just caught me off guard. I thought some kid was tryna steal it,” he says

You look at him with wide eyes, in complete disbelief, “has that ever happened before?” 

“No. Not yet.” 

“How ominous” you mutter and he lets out a bark of laughter and you can't help but admire his happiness, the curve of his smile, his toothy grin, the way his hair shines in the sunlight, the sparkle in his eyes. 

The impulse to kiss the smile off his lips comes hard and fast, but you hold back. This isn't the place or time for that but  _ god those lips.  _

You two eventually walk up to a small gated dirt race track, kids screaming as they speed around the track, racing to get to the finish line. Families are beside the track, hanging on to the rails as they cheer and whoop. 

“Alright brace yourself.” You hear Clyde murmur in your ear, and a wave of chills hit you. 

A young man and woman stroll up to you two. You can tell that they must be Clyde’s brother and sister. They all appear around the same age and if you look closely, you can see their physical similarities to Clyde. The man’s donning a trucker hat, a dark button-down shirt, and camouflage pants. He has a strong jawline, and like Clyde, he's tall and built with muscle. He's handsome, that’s for sure. The woman though is much tinier than the two brothers. She wears her long brown hair in two braids while wearing a knitted long sleeve with her bra peeking through, and blue shorts. They both look almost intimidating as they walk toward you, but that intimidation wears off quickly when the brother speaks. 

“Glad you guys could make it ” he greets you two with a smile, looking over at you, “ Hi there, I’m Jimmy,” he says, reaching out to shake your hand. 

You smile back, shaking his hand, “ I’m Y/N,” you love hearing the southern drawl in their voices. It makes you feel strangely at home, maybe because they remind you of Clyde. You turn to shake the lady’s hand as well. 

“Mellie,” she says simply with a small smile. 

“Pleasure to meet you both,” you say, trying to shake the nerves from your voice. 

“So, what’s been goin’ on here?” Clyde asks 

“Well Sadie just did one of them races over there,” Jimmy says, gesturing to the nearby racetrack, “She didn't win first, so she’s pretty torn up about it-”

“Which is ridiculous” Mellie interjects

“Yeah! I mean...the kid that won’s like 14, but she’s all tellin’ me it dont matter unless you win. I swear some of the things Bobby Jo be tellin’ her….” he lets out a deep exhale, shaking his head. 

“Who’s Sadie?” You ask, curious.

“My daughter,” Jimmy responds, “You’ll meet her at some point, but for now….I’m actually gonna hav’ta steal my brother for a sec.” he says, looking over at Clyde with a rather serious expression. 

Clyde clenches his jaw and nods, turning to you, “ Yeah we got some business to take care of real quick, won't take long.” 

You get a dreadful feeling that something's up, but You give a reassuring smile, “Okay that’s fine.” 

“Yeah I’ll keep her company till you boys come back” Mellie says cheerfully, grabbing your arm. 

 

As Jimmy and Clyde make their leave, You and Mellie walk around, eventually finding a race to watch, and sitting on some bleachers. You wish you could be with Clyde, but Mellie seems nice. 

“So..” Mellie starts,” When did you and Clyde meet?” 

You opened your mouth to answer but paused, suddenly feeling a bit embarrassed. 

“Uhm … last night?” you answer hesitantly. It just hit you that even though you feel as though you've known Clyde for a long time, it’s really only been a day. In reality, you know practically nothing about him. 

Mellie’s head whips around to stare at you with wide eyes, “really?! Clyde’s talkin’ bout you like he’s known you for years!” 

You find yourself getting confused, “Wait.. then When did Clyde talk to you guys about me?” 

“This mornin’. He was just talkin’ bout how he found this _amazin’ lady_ or something and asked if you could come along to the fair today. But if you guys met only last night…” 

She gave you a devious look. 

_ Oh  _

“Wait no I didn't sleep with him!” you paused, “ well I  _ did _ … but not like _that_. we didn't have sex or anythi-” 

Mellie’s giggling and you turned bright red, “ what my brother does ain't any of my business. But I know it’s been a while for him…” she drawls, looking out toward the race. 

“Sex?” 

“Well, not just sex. Just bein’ with anyone, not since Iraq. but if you're makin’ him happy, then who am I to object?” sipping on a beer she had bought before the race. 

“ I just..I don't know exactly what we are.” you say, looking down. You’re hopeful, yet concerned.

Unfortunately, you and Clyde are stuck in a limbo of  _ Are we dating? are we not?  _ You guys hadn't even been on an actual date, so it's hard to tell. 

He likes you that much is clear, but you don't want to be the one waiting for something to happen, only for it to fall through and be left alone. Especially considering your situation. 

“Don't be puttin’ labels on it for now. Clyde cares about you, but you caught him at a very… _ busy  _ time in his life.” 

A sinking feeling hits your stomach. You don't like the tone in which she says that, something's up and you can tell. 

“ What do you mean?” you question, hopefully hiding your suspicion. 

“ We got some…  _ family issues _ we been tryin’ to take care of. It's kind of personal.” she says looking at you, contemplating. 

That’s all you need to hear though, You don't want to push yourself into a business that's not yours.

“Oh ok. That's alright then, I hope it settles down soon.” You reply, grabbing your beer, now kind of flat, and sipping it lightly. 

Mellies looking at you intently, and you feel yourself shy away.

“ So what’s your story?” she asks, smirking. 

_ Oh god _

She sees you visibly tense and laughs, “ come on girl” nudging you with her elbow. She likes this one she decides. Hopefully, you’ll stay around after the heist. 

You tell her about everything, the layoff, the divorce, driving off without warning, all of it. 

“Well that sounds like quite the shitshow there.” 

“Yup,” you say as if it's almost funny. The memories illicit only a mild sting now, especially with Mellie's presence. She seems very open and genuine so You're comfortable around her, which seems to be a reoccurring feeling for these Logans.

You like it. 

“ So where exactly are you from?” Mellie asks. 

“Pennsylvania, Scranton.” 

“Mmm, so not too far from home yet. And what’s your husband’s name.” she sees you deflate, “sorry, ex-husband.” 

“Well...not technically yet, nothing has officially gone through..” you cringe, you shouldn't have said that. 

“Wait you're still married?” she questions, you nod, taking a sip of your beer. 

“ And you just drove off without thinkin’ bout it ?” you pause, then nod.

She looks out towards the sunny day for a moment, “ You know you're probably gonna have to go back right? Unless you can like, do it on the phone or somethin’” 

“ I’m not sure, I was gonna take care of it when it comes, but so far no one’s called me, or texted me…” you begin to feel a sense of dread within you. You let out a sigh, “ For now I'm just focusing on myself.” 

“That’s probably good”, Mellie says, “ does Clyde know you're still _technically_ married?” 

“ Yeah I think so.” You think about last night. You know you said you were getting a divorce, but you really did not expand on it too much.

“Good. Just don't be breakin’ my brother’s heart. I like you, but that don't mean shit if you hurt him.” 

You let out a small laugh. You don't plan to hurt Clyde, You’re just glad to hear that Mellie likes you.

“ I wont, I promise.” 

  
  


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“There they are,” Clyde says to Jimmy, gesturing to the two Bang brothers, furiously dunking their heads in the tub full of water, and throwing out rubber chickens, accompanied by an obnoxious crowd, yelling and cheering them on. 

“Holy hell..” Jimmy breathes. 

“Do we really need their help?” Clyde asks Jimmy. He knows that they need extra manpower on the outside for this plan to work, but come on. 

“ Yup that's the only way we gon be able to get Joe Bang’s help. Hey, maybe they’re more.... _capable_ than they seem.” Jimmy says as he peers across the crowd. Cringing at the sight before him. 

Clyde just lets out a grunt. 

“ So uh...how bout that girl?” Jimmy turns to Clyde with a grin plastered on his face. 

Clyde just shrugs,“What bout her?” 

“You call us this mornin’ askin to bring a girl with you to the fair all of a sudden, and now you ’re actin’ like doin’ that’s a normal thing for you. Who is she? When’d ya meet?” 

Clyde’s mind wanders to you, god you’re so cute and perfect. He feels his face get hot and he knows he’s blushing like an idiot, in front of his brother no less. He thinks about last night, and this morning. How comfortable he felt around you, how you told him that you were glad you met him. A happy warmth spreads throughout him. 

“ Well we ...uh, met last night at the bar. I was workin’ and she came in all alone and wet, shaky hands and all and, well ya know me. I had to try to keep her company-”

“Obviously,” Jimmy interjects nodding his head. 

“And well...ya know we just kinda hit it off.” Clyde says,” Talked for hours, and she uh... ended up staying over.” 

“Clyde!” Jimmy exclaims, laughing and punching him on the shoulder. Clyde just takes the punches before cutting in,” hey hey no we didn't do  _ that.  _ She just slept over, she’s got a lot goin' on...” trailing off into a mumble. Jimmy knows he’s not gonna be able to get the full story from Clyde, he’s too private. But he’s gotta at least try. 

“She must be different though. I mean I know its been a while but she’s gotta have somethin’ special about her to want to immediately introduce her to your family.” 

“ Well yeah, but... I didn't just bring her because I like her. Since she’s new to town, I figured I’d just show her around, maybe help her find a place to stay, maybe get her job too.” 

“ Yeah? Ya gonna build her a house too?” Jimmy suggests, laughing. Clyde shoots Jimmy a glare. 

“Depends”, Clyde mumbles, “ I might if I make it out of this damn plan without a life sentence.” 

Jimmy’s laugh stops and he just grabs his brother by the shoulder, sighing. 

“Look, this’ll work. Just trust me. And when you get all that money, you'll _ actually _ be able to build her that damn house.” 

Clyde exhales and nods. He knows he needs to do this, and he will. But he’ll be damned if he isn’t gonna bitch at least a little while doing it. Especially knowing that he might lose you in the process of doing this heist. He reserves the right to complain. 

“Well come on then we gotta go talk to these Bang brothers.” he gestures toward the two men standing on stage, whooping and cheering to the loud crowd. Apparently, they won. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> come hang out with me on tumblr we can talk about adam driver or something 
> 
> https://adumbdryer.tumblr.com


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess who finally got their shit together?? this biiiih   
> ended up being a lot longer than i expected and im pretty sure im unable to contain my thirst for Clyde jeez but i hope you like it.   
> btw in this Clyde and Jimmy arent living together in the trailer. It's just Clyde living on his own.

Something's up

Something's up and you can tell.

After you spend some alone time spent with Mellie and Clyde with Jimmy, you both finally got to meet up and spend time together at the park again. You two mostly just strolled around, enjoying the sun’s warmth and each other's presence, but you couldn't help but notice the stiff way Clyde was walking and the abnormally large amount of distance between you two.

You didn't say anything in hopes that with some time, he’ll begin to feel better. You remember Mellie. Just some family business anyway, it'll get settled.

After some time, Clyde leaned down to ask if we could go someplace else. The feeling of his breath against the shell of your ear sent chills down your spine, but you try to ignore the small pit heat pooling in your stomach from his close proximity.

“Where do you wanna go?” you ask turning to him, the close distance between your faces making you blush.

“Not sure,” he mumbled, looking down, “it's just… everythin’ is so loud and all the lights are gettin’ to me.” he looked so guilty, with those pouty lips and big puppy eyes, how could you say no?

The overall noise and heat of the day was starting to get to you too, so Clyde’s suggestion was for the best. You both moved to a nice secluded spot in a field a bit further from the loud fair site, under a nice big oak tree, shielding you two from the beaming sun. As the sun starts to set you both sit in a comfortable silence, watching the beautiful sky bloom with natural oranges, pinks, and blues, as the sun slowly makes it way down the hillside.

You and Clyde are sitting on the crunchy grass, leaning against each others shoulders and quietly sipping on your flat beers.

Looking over at Clyde, you took the time to admire him. The way the colorful sun and sky reflected in his eyes, the way his hair brushes back against the gentle breeze, the way his Adam's apple bobs when swallowing small sips of his beer. The scatter of moles across his sun-kissed skin. He seems so lost in thought. You wish you knew what he was thinking.

“Hey Clyde..” you spoke in a soft tone, not wanting to stir anything up.

“Hmm?” he says dragging his attention from the sunset to you.

“Are...are you alright?” you started, “ it just...since you came back from talking with Jimmy..you seem kinda tense.”

His eye widened a bit and he started, “ Oh! it's not...like...um,” he pauses, takes a breath and speaks softly, “I’m sorry if I've been distant lately. I didn't really want you to feel that way. I wanted you to get to know the town a little bit better, bein’ new and all. My brother Jimmy though…” he takes a deep sigh, “he just kinda frustrates me sometimes.”

You think back to Jimmy, talking about his daughter and laughing with his beer, he seems sweet Nothing about him seems crazy or suspicious, but everybody’s got layers, and if anyone knew Jimmy the best, it would be Clyde.

“What’s he doing?” you ask, curious.

Clyde tenses up for a bit but then relaxes, “ It’s just we got this...family business that we gotta take care of and he’s makin’ it a lot more complicated. Or maybe I am. I don't know.” he trails off shaking his head.

There it is again. The family business.

You sit in silence for a bit, thinking, but eventually, you spoke, “Clyde, now I don't know the entire story, but...you don't have to do what he says if it makes you uncomfortable or puts you in danger, you know that right? He doesn't own you”

“ No I-I know that. It's just I don't want... _certain people_ lookin’ at me differently because of it” he responds, looking up and meeting your eyes. A nervous but hopeful glint in his eyes telling you everything you need to hear.

You scooch over and snuggle further up against him, “ Look, I don't know who these _certain people_ are that you're  _dying_ for approval from, but I’m sure that no matter what happens, everything will be alright. No one's gonna think less of you. No one's gonna look down on you. Do what you think is best, and you’ll still be this..” you look him over,“ ...tall, beefy, adorable man with a kind heart and a selfless attitude.”

He lets out a small chuckle, looks down and mumbles “well I don't know ‘bout all of _that_.”

“Well I do,” you say, smiling and reaching out to tuck a small piece of loose hair behind his ear. His cheeks take a small tint of pink as he watches you. You treat him with a type of gentle kindness that no one else has ever treated him with before.

_I_ _t’s nice_ he decides.

He grins and moves his hand over to intertwine his fingers into yours and you two sit, humming contently.

“L-lets not talk about that anymore though. Are you hungry?” he asked.

It had gotten pretty late and the moment Clyde mentioned getting food you realized _yeah wow you're hungry_ so you both decided to stop by a cute little diner in town called Val’s. Grabbing some burgers and fries and since You got a chocolate milkshake. Clyde was clearly jealous, huffing in envy. Every time you turned your head away he’d snatch the straw and drink up as much as he could til you saw and smacked him on the shoulder.

“ Hey!” and he burst into a fit of giggles, nearly shooting milkshake out of his nose.

After the diner, you and Clyde finally came home, exhausted by a full day of activities you start to settle into bed, your head resting on his chest as you two snuggle for warmth under plush sheets and covers.

 

Clyde’s home has pretty much become your home at this point. At first, he talked about you getting your own place but as the days turned into weeks in his trailer, you just offered to help pay for a portion of the bills and Clyde found that as an easy enough solution.

He’s not complaining about your presence in his life. In fact, he’s found that he’s a lot happier throughout the days with you around. Waking up to see your face in the morning, getting kissed by the rays of sunshine through the windows and he can only lie there, admiring you in your sleep, wishing he could do the same. But he never does, afraid that he'll ruin this good thing that you both got.

When Clyde's at work he asks around for any opening job positions for you but he can't really find anyone looking to hire. You walk through town, passing out your resume to any position that looks promising. Despite both of your efforts, you haven't received any calls or emails regarding interviews, so you eventually give up.

“Hey darlin’,” he walks out of the bedroom to the couch, plopping himself next to you as you type away furiously on the computer.

“Remember to add what we need from the grocery store I'm gonna make a trip soon.” he reminded you. You nod but don't look up, still typing on your laptop. He stares at you for a while, amused at your concentration.

“Yoo hoo ~,” he says waving his hand in your face. You look up to him and sigh, pinching your brows.

“Sorry, Clyde. I’m just having a hard time with finding a job. I didn't expect it to be this difficult and I'm running low on my savings.” You scowl towards the laptop. Why did you have to get laid off?

Clyde can tell you're frustrated and he's pretty frustrated too, so he asked you about working over at Duck Tape.

“You wouldn't be immediately bartending, probably just running tables at first and cleaning, it won't be all that glamorous, but it'll pay the bills” he starts to trail off asking and he looks over at you.

“Really?”

“Yeah, I got extra hours and need some extra hands. You and I already live together. Seems like an easy solution.”

You had been secretly wishing for Clyde to ask for you to work at the bar so you can spend more time with him and now that he’s finally asked, you can't help but be excited.

“Yes! That would be wonderful. Thank you Clyde!” you reply excitedly, jumping into his arms and giving him a massive hug. He just chuckles and holds onto you tighter, enjoying the closeness and your scent.

“Will you teach me how to make a Mojito?!” you ask, giggling and jumping all around him as he makes his way to the kitchen, “ or a Cosmopolitan or a Mai Tai or a -”

“Hey hey hey I _said_ no bartending yet,” he says, sighing and trying to get you just stop jumping on him, _dear lord_. He eventually just wraps you in a bear hug holding you tightly against him so you would just _calm down_

“Haha I'm just excited to finally work with you…” you giggle, trailing off as you become more aware of your surroundings, which are mainly Clyde’s muscular arms. His arms embraced you, warm and secure. You look up and into his honey brown eyes, both of you still grinning lazily at each other. You two are so close. You can feel the warmth and electricity between you, wondering what's gonna happen when you see his eyes bounce up and down from your eyes to your lips.

Heart beating faster and faster, you slide your hands up against his chest and hear him take a sharp inhale. _This is it_. After about a month of staying with each other, The heat between you two is beginning to get unbearable. You just want to lean in and take those plump lips between your own, but you hold back, waiting for him. Hoping that he’ll eventually lose control and _just kiss you_.

The tensions become too much and You look away for a second out of nerves. And when you look back to Clyde’s soulful eyes, you see that something had changed in them, something died.

He abruptly lets you go and sets you down on your feet. But the air around you two has changed dramatically and you're left a little confused.

“‘M gonna go get the stuff from the grocery store,” he mumbles and grabs his wallet, keys, and heads out. He shuts the door and you're still standing in the kitchen, confused and a little heartbroken.

What the hell was that? One second it looked like he was gonna kiss the breath away from you, and then he just ups and leaves? You sigh, defeated and going back to the couch.

You're well aware of the fact that you spend probably a little too much time stuck in your own head, but right now all you want is to be in Clyde’s head. You want to know what he's thinking and feeling, especially with everything else that's happening to him. You just want to help him because he was the one that was there to help you when you were so lost and alone, shaking and crying. You want to give him the same sense of security that he gave you when he walked into your life.

You walk to the bedroom, leaning over and grabbing your phone from the charger. No messages. Of course.

As the time passed, you began to stop caring about your entire other life before West Virginia, but every once in a while You get one or two texts from your best friend or parents making sure that you're okay, and occasional emails from different companies that yours had been involved with.

You're especially worried that you haven't heard anything from your ex and you damn sure aren't gonna text him first, but there's been no divorce in process and the more you spend time with Clyde, the more you're considering going back up home to try and finalize an actual divorce.

You scroll through your contacts confused. He knows to give you some space when you're angry but at this point, you've been in West Virginia for little over a month, you would expect to at least call you to make sure you're alive.

it's not like you blocked him or anything.

Scrolling through your apps, you begin to wonder.

You find yourself looking through your contact list and- _What_? You cant even find his contact? Did you delete it?

Scrolling all the way to the bottom, you get to the Blocked Contacts section...wait... did you _actually_ -? You clicked and lo and behold.

The contact name **Jason** pops up and your stomach hits the floor.

“Oh _shit_ ”

~~~~~~~~~

The first thing Clyde does when he gets into his pickup truck was punching the steering wheel. Breathing hard out his nose and huffing a sharp “fuck” under his breath.

He can’t stop thinking about how your eyes lit up when he offered you the job at Duck Tape and your cute little jumping and laughing. How your smaller frame felt in his arms, so precious, he wants to hold you every day for the rest of his life.

He looks down at his prosthetic. Running his fingers along the plastic and thinking. You're one of the very few people who hasn't made him feel insecure about his arm, almost as if he never lost it in the first place. He's trying so hard to be calm in your presence but in truth, he’s just so desperate for you.

And it's absolutely killing him.

He’s been dreaming about you too. And they aren't as innocent and cute as the thoughts he thinks about you during the day.

He thinks about what it would look like to have you spread open for him, lying on his bed, hair splayed across the pillow and your hips grinding against his. Whining for him to break you open and fill you up. He thinks back to when you spent the first night together, how he was dry humping you like a horny little boy in the morning.

He’s definitely been masturbating more since you came around. Living in the same place and sleeping in the same bed as you basically means that you both are naked around each other all the time.

For the most part, Clyde is able to hold back and keep some control, but every once in a while, you’ll bend over to pick something you dropped and he can't help but look at your long legs and wonderful ass. He’s had to excuse himself to the bathroom to relieve himself and hope that you don’t notice his escape.

He hasn't really been with anyone in a long time. Occasionally there was a nice girl or two who would flirt with him at the bar, but that was always it, nothing more. He had a girlfriend in high school but they ended up breaking up when he decided to join the military. When he got home, finding a mate was the least of his worries and ever since then romance and intimacy have always been put on the back burner.

That is until he met you. He loves to hold your hand and he thinks about what it would be like to finally taste your lips and run his fingers through your hair. As the days pass, the dreams get worse.

There was one dream that got him particularly.

Clyde has never considered himself a jealous man, but god in his dream you were at the bar, like the day he met you. Except the bar wasn't as empty like before, it was absolutely packed and he couldn't even get over to your side of the bar, much less talk to you. But there were a group of sleazy looking men surrounding you, looking at you like you were something to eat. All predatory gazes and Clyde felt a rush of red-hot heat surge up to his chest.

He didn't do anything, just manned the bar and shot the men glares as best he could.

But the men, they were touching you, twirling your hair, resting their hands on your leg. You were giggling and smiling flirtatiously at them and Clyde was about to snap.

It was when one of the men, reached around and grabbed your waist when Clyde finally lost it. Not saying a word, He stormed over to the group of men and yanked the man's arm away from you.

“Don't touch her” He gritted his teeth, snarling at the man.

“Clyde! What are you-” you're cut off to the sounds of knuckles cracking against skin. The faceless man slumped to the ground and Clyde whipped around to fight the other surrounding men. When he turns though, he isn't greeted by the reckless crowd at Duck Tape anymore.

He's back in his sunny lit trailer, wearing nothing but his boxers and standing in the living room, skin boiling and covered in sweat. It must be 100 degrees outside, and he doesn't have any air conditioning in the trailer so he's burning up.

What just happened? He’s so confused. Is he still dreaming?

He wanders towards the kitchen area, he sees pots and pans piled up in the sink.

A small moan breaks the silence of the hot summer day, catching Clyde off guard. Are you here?

“Y/N?” he calls out.

“Clyde? In here…” he hears a weak voice come from the bedroom.

He stumbles over to his bedroom to see...

Oh

He nearly collapses when he sees you, lying on his bed completely naked and covered in a hot sheen of sweat. Legs spread as he watches you plunge two of your fingers in and out of your dripping cunt at a slow agonizing pace, whining for more. The smell of sex hung in the room and Clyde takes a deep inhale, Hungry. He can see a small wet spot forming on the bed and he feels his knees go weak.

When you finally look up at him, you let out a moan and pull your fingers out, circling your clit with two of your fingers.

“Clyde please..” you rasp out, humping the bed.

He goes to move and realizes he can't. He can only stand there, frozen in place, cock hard, and watch as you pleasure yourself. He groans with frustration. What he’d give to just finally rip of his boxers and climb onto the bed, and fuck you like a wild animal.

But he cant. He can only sit and watch, gripping the side of the doorframe as best as he could.

“Clyde..” you whisper shaking and whimpering, “ I'm s-so close, I'm so-”

You throw your head back, moaning, cursing, and cumming. Hands gripping the sheets, Back arched off the bed and mouth formed in a perfect O that makes Clyde’s cock twitch and he looks away, growling out a sharp “Fuck!” and then-

“Fuck!” he yelled as he woke up to perfect silence, covered in sweat and panting. He looks over to see you, soundlessly sleeping curled up against him.

He was so embarrassed when he had to peel himself off of you to go to the bathroom in hopes of relieving himself, but he never heard you say anything.

Ever since that specific dream, he hasn't been able to think clearly around you. He’s happy that you're with him, and he wants to be more than just a friend with you, but he still has to remain loyal to the plan, which will likely make you hate him in the future.

He still hasn't told you about his time in juvie yet and he's supposed to be making his move soon. What if he gets out of jail and he never sees you again? What if you decide that you don't wanna be with an Ex-con? That you're too good for that? He wouldn't be able to handle it.

What is he even doing now? He knows when you find out he's been put in jail that you'll be shocked and heartbroken that he got wrapped up in one of jimmy's plans again and thrown in jail.

Clenching his jaw, he thinks about all the people who pitied him when he was younger. That poor logan boy, constantly getting in trouble. Can't do anything good for himself.

What if the plan fails? What if he never gets out?

Clyde runs his fingers through his hair grips it hard by the roots, out of anger and frustration, feels the tug and let's go.

He wants to spend as much time with you as he can but the bitterness that comes with the fear of losing you is eating away at him and making him go insane. When he gets so close to you like that, he suddenly can't breathe and his heart pounds in his chest, but the sinking feeling that he's just gonna eventually hurt you is what holds him back.

Back in the kitchen, you got too close too fast and he just needed to get out of there. The feeling of instant regret washed over him the moment he left, but he needed to cool down.

The anxiety is tearing him apart so he takes a deep breath and focuses on his surroundings.

He finally pulls into the nearest grocery store and parks, getting out and trying to distract himself with the chore of grocery shopping. He walks through the aisle, weaving through people and checking off foods on the list, but some items were not on the list.

He realized he had stormed out before you were able to write the rest of the items on there.

He sighs deeply.

Hell just make another trip soon.

He checks out methodically and takes his time, thinking of different ways he can explain himself to you when he gets home. Packing up and driving out of the parking lot.

~~~~~~~

“Oh my god oh my god oh my god,” you repeat over and over, pacing back and forth.

_When did you block Jason?_!

It was probably after the night he told you he wanted to get a divorce, you stormed out pretty quickly and purged your phone, not wanting to contact him whatsoever. But you didn't want to block him.

_He could've been calling me for weeks and I wouldn't know. Oh god, what if I unblock him and he calls me immediately and I won't even know what to say-_

Your racing thoughts are interrupted by the screen door being opened, the sound of plastic bags brushing against each other.

Clyde's home.

You take a deep breath. it's best to just set this aside for now and make up with Clyde. He's more important anyway.

You get up and stand awkwardly around him as he sets the bags on the table looking down the entire time.

“Couldn't get everythin’ on the list. Sorry” he mumbles. You're leaning up against the counter watching him. He looks like a boy that knows he's in trouble getting ready for a scolding and you forget about what happened before. All you want to do is hold him in your arms. Kiss him. Taste him.

“Clyde…” you whisper. The longing is killing you. He looks up and you both hold eye contact, air vibrating and tension building. Clyde’s gripping the outer edge. he's trying so hard to hold back but why?

You slowly walk over to him, keeping the eye contact, and licking your lips.

His hearts skips a beat and he backs up until he bumps against the counter.

You both are so close, you can smell each others scent. You press yourself up against him, dragging your nails down his chest and savoring the feeling of his solid muscular body against you.

Both of your lips practically touching each other, he's panting, almost whining. Arms wrapped around your waist and a hungry look in his eyes. Everything is still and then...

“Clyde..kiss me” you breathe out finally.

Immediately he grips your waist harder and pulls you in, slamming his soft lips against yours, savoring your taste.

You moan into his mouth, and he's prying your lips apart, sliding his wet tongue in your mouth. You grip onto his shirt, eventually pulling apart from the kiss but he just hides his face in the crook of your neck, holding you.

“I'm sorry” you hear him whisper softly into your neck

“Hey hey it's okay” you reassure, petting his hair and cooing him. You feel so relieved that Clyde's finally yours, running your fingers through his hair.

“Everything's gonna be alright Clyde it's okay.” He doesn't say anything.

He just mumbles into your ear “I'm sorry” over and over, voice breaking. You don't really know what he's apologizing for but you assume it was for the misunderstanding earlier.

To Clyde though, he can't stop apologizing. Holding onto you and repeating it like a mantra, as if he's begging you to never leave him.

_I'msorryI'msorryI'msorry_

Not for what he just did, but for what he's about to do when he, Jimmy and Mellie rob Charlotte Motor Speedway.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> come talk to me http://adumbdryer.tumblr.com


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the deed is finally done

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> took a while but i finally got a chance to update!  
> thank you to all who gave kudos and comments it really means a lot  
> this is pretty sad tbh its like all angst so fair warning.

Time stands still as Clyde sits in his car, and he closes his eyes, taking in a deep breath. He’s parked outside the local Save Mart. The gas station that he's supposed to be driving his car into but he just can't seem to do it. Not just yet.

He wants to savor these last seconds before he truly realizes the amount of pain that he’s about to put you through. The guilt weighs heavy on his chest, but he tells himself that it will be for the best over and over. Why would you want to be with him? Some dirty country boy that’s breaking the law all the time and always getting into trouble. He’s no good for someone so sweet and kind like you.

He likes to think he can still turn back. Go back to the trailer with you, pack up and run away so you can live together on your own, but that’s just some silly fantasy.

He knows that he’d be betraying his family, especially with everything in the plan being put in place. They’re just waiting for him to make the first step so everything will fall into action. If he leaves, he could risk getting his whole family getting caught and in trouble. He loves you but he loves his family also. He can't put you above his family, not now when they need him like this. Maybe there’s still hope when he gets out.

 _If_ he gets out.

He sits, clenching his jaw, frustrated with the constant battle between his head versus his heart.

He knows what his decision is, he just doesn't want to go through with it _just_ yet. What he really wants is to at least go home and see you one last time, tell you everything and properly say goodbye.

He resigns, pursing lips and switching the car into drive.  
“Cauliflower.” he grits out, ragged and forced, before he slams his foot on the gas with a loud screech of the tires, closing his eyes and bracing himself for the impact.

~~~

You lie on Clyde's bed in the dark, trying to fall asleep, but he hasn't come home yet and it's nearly 3 am. The bar closes at 2. He should be here by now. 

You roll over and check the time on your phone, and checking to see if he's messaged you. Usually, when he stays out abnormally late he will at least text you, but there are no notifications.

You've grown used to the feeling of having someone right beside you when you sleep, enjoying that feeling of solid warmth pressed against you. Even the little puffs Clyde lets out when he snores that tickle the back of your neck reminds you that he’s right there beside you, safe and sound. You feel so secure and protected when you sleep with Clyde, and when he's not here like this, you feel so bare and exposed. The vulnerability you’re left with when he’s not here makes you anxiety-ridden, too nervous to fall asleep and get your mind off of where he could be.

You roll around, burying your face in the sheets, struggling to simply close your eyes. You huff, frustrated before you turn to grab your phone off the side table and look into your contacts. You should at least try to call him.

There’s one small ring before It goes straight to voicemail, and you feel yourself getting more and more anxious. You throw yourself back on the back staring at the ceiling, worrying.

You try again, hoping that he’ll pick up this time. And nothing. 

The beep comes to leave a message and you sigh,

“ Hey Clyde, I’m jus-just wondering where you are it’s pretty late and I'm worried about you. I know your phone probably just died, but please call me back and let me know you’re fine. Okay, I love you, bye.”

You yawn when you press the end button, before realizing what you just said freezing up. You just told Clyde _that you loved him!_

"Oh god,” you sigh, before putting your head in your hands.

It’s not like you don’t mean it, it’s just been a rough and confusing past couple of months for you. To have to still deal with a marriage that is still falling apart to a man you thought you loved, but then also to develop such strong feelings for someone you’ve just met recently. Clyde's so sweet and funny, always hiding behind a stoic demeanor around others, but when you’re with him, actually _living_ with him, you have intimacy with him that no one else has.

After you two kissed, it's like you both were in heaven, snuggling up to each other in bed, giggling like kids. Kissing his cheek, and thanking him when he’s making breakfast in the morning. The blushy look and shy smile he gave you made you feel so warm in your heart. You felt so lightheaded with joy, and you two were living without a care in the world except for each other. When you saw Clyde smiling happily to himself as he did small mundane chores, you couldn't help but sigh. Clyde should always be smiling like that. He deserves to be happy.

And you were happy too, but then he started to be short with you. Only responding to your questions with a couple words, pulling away when you grabbed his hand. You even found him late at night sitting out in the living room, on the couch in the dark, looking out the window.

“Clyde, are you okay?” you whispered out, worried.

He shot his head over to you and you couldn't see the expression on his face, but you heard him sniffing and moving to wipe at his eyes before he rasped out, “Yeah sweetheart I’m alright. I’ll be back in bed in a sec.”

You nodded and he eventually came back to bed, hiccuping lightly and you rolled over to bury your face in his chest. You could hear his uneven breathing, and your heart broke. You don't know why he’s been so distant and so sad, but when you ask he won't tell you and it’s tearing you apart.

You look over to check the time, 3:30 am and you’re filled with dread. You need to go to sleep, but the thought of Clyde being in trouble or hurt nearly brings you to tears. You feel your throat get tight so you roll over onto your stomach, and try to will yourself to sleep, drifting in and out. Telling yourself that he’s gonna come back, that he’s safe at Mellie’s, something just broke in his car and he had to get it towed.

Whatever you need to think to get you to finally close your eyes and sleep.

 

When you wake up in the morning and he’s still not there, you rush to grab your phone. Nothing from him. You begin to panic. Where the _hell_ did he go?  
Should you go look for him? You try to reason with yourself that he might’ve just woken up and gone to work, or to Mellie’s or Jimmy’s, but the sinking feeling in your stomach tells you otherwise.

You try to call him one more time. Maybe this time he'll pick up.

Nothing. Straight to voicemail and you’re so confused. Why would he just up and leave like this? He would have at least told you.

“Hey Clyde, it’s me again, um you didn't come home last night and now I’m starting to get really worried,” you sigh, “ I’m gonna call Jimmy and Mellie to see but, please just when you get to a phone, call me.” Your voice is starting to strain and you hang up, looking down and trying to take steady breaths.

He’s been the one thing that’s been a constant since you’ve been here and to have him suddenly disappear like this is so jarring for you. Hell, you’re _in_ his home.

You wait a bit, wasting time at the trailer, making food and cleaning the kitchen, but when you sit down, all you think about where Clyde could’ve gone. It's eating away at you and you eventually give up.

You start typing in Jimmy’s number, getting a couple rings before you eventually hear a gruff voice,

“mmHello?” Jimmy rasps.

“Hey, Jimmy. U-um have you seen Clyde? He didn't come home last night and he’s still gone and I’m really worried. Is he with you?”  
You hear a pause and a bit of rustling before you hear Jimmy sigh,

“Look, Y/N Clydes been goin’ through some stuff lately and he-”

You clench your jaw, frustrated. You've been panicking since last night and you’ve hit your limit.

You snap, “I know he’s been going through stuff Jimmy! I see him every night and that’s why I’m worried! I don't know whats going on with your _family business_ because Clyde won't tell me a damn thing about it, and I’m fine with that but if he’s in trouble. I need to know. Do you know where he is or not?” You practically spit the last words out.

You don't want to be snapping like this but your anxiety is boiling over, burning your insides with fear for the worst.  
There's a long pause and you almost give up and press the end button before you hear,

“Okay, okay. I know where he is, but you can't tell him I told you.”

You huff and furrow your brow, confused, why wouldn't Clyde want me to know?

“H-he’s at the Monroe County Correctional facility..”

You take some time to process that, wait-

“He’s in jail!?”

“We didn't wanna tell you bout it cause we knew you was gonna get worried!” he reasoned

“I was worried either way Jimmy,” You put your head in your hand, “oh my god, What did he do?!”

“Don't worry he’s okay, he just ...drove his car through a gas station store.”

“What?!” you scream, “why the hell would he do that?”

“Y/N calm down just calm down, he’s alright. It was an accident, just a slip of the pedals, he’s servin’ but its only for 90 days, he’ll be out soon.” Jimmy reasons

You were relieved to hear that he was alright but finding out that he was in jail was a shock that never crossed your mind. He did not strike you as the type of guy that’s served time, but accidentally driving a car into a gas station store isn't among the worst crimes out there, so you just sigh, frustrated.

“S-so what I’m I supposed to do here? What about the bar? I’m just gonna wait for him?”

“look, I don’t really know okay? He’s not goin’ anywhere but he…” Jimmy pauses, “ He don't wanna see you.”

You blink in surprise at that. He doesn't want to see you? You feel your heart sink at the thought, but a raging anger stirs inside you.

“What does _that_ mean?” you snap at him.

“He don't know I told you and he didn't want you to know. I’m not sure _why_ and he didn't tell me, but I’ve just been tryin’ to keep my promise.”

You huff, you’re not gonna fight Jimmy because of Clyde’s decision but you’re just so frustrated and angry and _hur_ t.

“So I can't visit him, can I ?” you mumble out, throat tightening and tears building up in your eyes.

“...I don't think that’d be a good idea.” You hear his voice go soft. He feels bad for you, and it made you even angrier. You sigh and hang up. you knew everything you needed to.

You sit on the couch, trying to process everything that you heard. The tears eventually spill out and you let them fall, before you’re wracked with sobs, curling up on the couch.

Clyde’s okay, but if he doesn't want you to see him, then you won't try. You look around the trailer, sniffling, and you finally realize that this isn't your home. Though for a while it felt like it was, it was just temporary. This trailer is Clyde’s and all you’ve been doing is just intruding on his life, making him put everything on pause just for you. You feel so selfish and bitter and all you want to do is _talk to him_. But jimmy’s words ring in your ears.

You don't know what to do about right now though, you’re sitting in his home, should you leave? Where would you even go? Back on the road searching aimlessly again?  
Maybe you should just go back to Scranton. See some family and friends, finally, Figure out the divorce and try to at least get that done. Clyde’s gonna be gone for a while and he may not even want to see you at his place by the time he gets back so what else do you have to lose?

Before you’re even second-guessing your decision you pull up Jason’s contact, take a deep breath, and click call.

It’s time to go home.

~~~

From the moment Jason picked up the phone, you knew this was all gonna go to hell.

“Well, well, well. Haven't heard from you in a while...”

The smugness in his tone when you finally told him you were traveling back had you shaking in anger as if he knew all along that you were gonna come crawling back for his forgiveness. You've already had to deal with the news about Clyde this morning, you have no patience for whatever bullshit Jason’s about to pull now.

“Listen, I am _not_ coming back to see if we can work this out, I’m coming back so we can file, and split up our assets. We can schedule a hearing when I’m there, but when this is done I’m _leaving_.” You speak in a definite tone, this is final and you want him to know that.

“Alright alright. That's fine we can do that, but uh-” a pause, “How you been doing?” 

You sigh,” I’m fine, just had some stuff I needed to figure out.” you say, scratching your head, anxious for the conversation to end, “Look I’ll be there in a couple of days, just let me know where to meet up and when and I’ll be there, alright?”

All you hear is a small “alright “ before you hang up. You stand up and walk around the trailer, picking up things that are yours and stuffing them into your bags. You take in each detail of the home, almost trying to take a picture with your memory in case you never come back.

With the mess that’s been absolutely consuming every bit of your life, at least you got to meet Clyde.

You look over to your phone on the counter, Contemplating. You eventually give in, you just wanna speak to him one more time before you leave, even if he won't hear it.

“Hey Clyde, look I-,” you choke on your words, trying to steady your breathing before you finally get it out, “ -I know what happened and I know you didn't want Jimmy to tell me but you probably won't get this till you’re out. I’m gonna be going away for a while, need some time to fix what’s going on at home. When you get out please call me. I’m gonna miss you…” you pause and clench your jaw, blinking back tears, and you whisper "... I love you,” before ending the call.

You wipe away at the wetness streaking your cheeks and force yourself to continue packing.

You finally lock the trailer and get all your bags loaded into your car, but you look at the key to his trailer in your hand. He made you one a couple months ago, but what should you do with it now?

You just huff and stuff it back into your pocket.

You’ll give it to him when you come back.

  
~~~

The first night at the prison was the most difficult night he’s had in a long time. He tossed and turned in his bunk, anxiety-ridden. Staring at the ceiling, he tries to close his eyes, but he can’t stop the constant buzzing of his own chaotic thoughts.

He can’t even think about going to sleep because all he thinks of is you. He feels as if a piece of him is missing, a hole in his chest that sinks deeper and deeper with every passing minute in here.  
  
All he wants is to go home and cuddle up on the couch with you and watch whatever's on tv but he’s stuck in this cell, waiting to make his move. In the end, this will benefit everyone involved, but right here, _right now_. He feels like he could actually die of heartbreak.

He rolls over onto his side, staring at the rock cell wall and sighs, he feels so guilty.

He knows you’re gonna wake up and realize he’s not there. He knows you’re gonna ask around. He knows that you’ll probably find out where he is, and he knows that when he gets home 90 days later you won’t be there to welcome him, all because he couldn't tell you the plan.

He feels like just another scumbag guy that betrayed you, putting you through _more_ stress after everything you’ve been through already. He never wanted to be the cause of your pain but this plan has been a long time coming. He’s had time to brace himself for this kind of anguish, but he never knew that it would feel like _this._

Part of him desperately wants you to come by because he just needs to see your face, give him reassurance that everything's gonna be okay. But he doesn't want you to see him like this, in a jumpsuit locked behind bars, just like when he was young. _Pathetic_. He doesn't want you to come visit, tell him that you’re too good for a criminal like him, that you’ve gone back to your husband-

His breath stutters and hot tears pour out of his eyes, staining his cheeks. He buries his face in the pillow trying to muffle the sobs that shake through his body.

Your husband doesn't deserve you, he won’t treat you right or be good to you, but neither would he. He’d just hurt you over and over until you break and leave.

He tried so hard throughout the day to remain calm when he was with you but inside he felt like he was dying, anxiety tearing at his insides and all he could do was try to not think about the pain.

He can already see the look on your face when you find out he’s in jail, leaving you all alone. Seeing the respect for him die right then and there. The thought of seeing you cry again, lip quivering and eyes downcast and all because of him

He grits his teeth and pulls on his hair, _what has he done!?!_ The first woman in a long time that _finally_ understands him and cares about him, and he took that for granted and threw you away. He should’ve told you, he should’ve not listened to Jimmy and just _told you._

He knew he couldn't say anything about the plan but he wanted to at least tell you goodbye, that he loves you before he left, but he knew that telling you would only worsen the pain that he was about to inflict.

But he _does_ love you. He has for a long time.

He wants to desperately go back to the beginning, making breakfast and holding hands. Back in that bubble of happiness where you looked at him like he was the most precious thing in the world.

He just wants to go back.

His chest pounds and he tries to muffle his quiet sobs, but he’s failing and he feels so stuck. He’s already homesick and he hasn't even gone a whole day. How is he gonna make it through here without you?

He doesn't know what to do. There’s not much else he can do.

The damage is done and he has to pay the consequences.


	6. Chapter 6

When you took off back home, you had immediately called your best friend, Emma. She was the only one who sent the occasional message to you when you left, so she knew that you were staying with a man named Clyde, but that was really it. She knows you well enough to know when to give you space, especially when you’re under such stress, but when you called her asking to stay at her place with her while you finalize your divorce, she was more than happy to help, to your relief.

“Of course you can stay here! I haven't seen you in forever and we can finally catch up!” she squeals excitedly, “When do you think you’ll get here?”

“Probably tonight, around ten or eleven.”

“Alright, I'll be waiting by the door with a bottle of wine.”

“Oh, thank god” you sigh with relief and you hear a faint giggle over the phone. 

“Okay, well then I guess I'll see you when you get here, love you!”

“Love you too, see ya later,” you respond before hanging up.

 

You stare blankly at the road, mind wandering in hopes to distract yourself from the constant worrying that's been plaguing your mind since you spoke to Jimmy. You hope Clyde’s at least okay. You don't know what its like to be in jail but from what you've always seen on tv, it's not pleasant.  
But why would Clyde drive his car into a store?

You feel like if it was an accident, he wouldn't have been put in jail right? And Clyde wouldn't just _drive_ into a store intentionally. That doesn't make any sense. You sigh. Hopefully, these questions get answered when you come back and Clyde gets out.

However, right now, you have to deal with ending your first relationship. Nerves race through your body at the thought of finally seeing Jason again. He can be...unpredictable and even though your conversation on the phone with him was quick and painless, being with him in person is completely different.

Your marriage wasn't perfect, but no marriage is. However over these past months, you've spent with Clyde; with him kissing the top of your head, holding your hand, even wrapping his arms around you at night when you're cold, you began to realize that Jason never really did those things. You never really displayed affection like that in your relationship with him, but you never thought twice about it, because to you, he just wasn't the affectionate type.

You didn't really realize how much you needed that physical touch and small affections. You've starved yourself of it for a long time and before you've always thought about how unnecessary actions like those were. But now that you've shared those intimate moments with Clyde. Sitting in a comfortable silence, simply enjoying each others presence. You couldn't get enough. being able to just lie next to him, Running your fingers along his hand, lightly dragging it up along his forearm and bicep, tracing the skin. Just touching each other.

He’d always casually run his hand along your inner thigh, and it’d make you jump and suck in a sharp breath initially before you eventually got used to the feeling. You two would just sit there, pressed up against each other as his hand mindlessly slid along your thigh while watching tv, caressing your soft skin.

When you were with Clyde you were at peace, finally able to focus and enjoy the moment in front of you.

And Clyde was a _great_  kisser. His lips are so soft and feel absolutely perfect against your own. You love the taste of him, sucking on his tongue and hearing him let out low moans, it drove you wild. In the short time you two spent actually like a couple, you two spent most of it lying in bed or on the couch, lazily kissing each other and cuddling. It felt like heaven.

He would push the pace most of the time, running his hand along the back of your neck and cupping the base of your head, gripping onto your hair and trailing kisses down your neck. He’d leave little bites that made you whine and squirm. He left before you two were able to actually have sex, but you thought about it a lot.

He’s got a great body, thick muscle, and strong arms that you didn't expect from him at first. you couldn't help but just admire his body sometimes, silently staring at him as he walks around in just a towel, fresh out of the shower.

You’ve seen him naked, you two lived together so it was inevitable. But you had never actually seen his dick. You've _felt_ it plenty of times when you guys sleep together, with his entire body pressed up behind you, cock brushing against your ass.

From what you've felt, it was _big_ but Clyde always tries to cover himself in an attempt to be respectful with you, to your dismay, but there was one particular time when you caught him masturbating, completely exposed. the lewd image of him, debauched and helpless still hangs with you, making you blush and bite your lip.

You had walked into the bedroom looking for a book to read and you saw him sitting on the edge of the bed with his head thrown back, pants around his ankles, no shirt on with his hair completely disheveled and skin shiny with sweat. His broad chest colored with the deep blush as he panted desperately. His eyes were scrunched together in concentration and his mouth hung agape in an expression that you could only describe as pure pleasure.

Your jaw had dropped. You never really thought about what Clyde would look like touching himself. You had always imagined yourself to be the one doing the touching, so you stood there in shock.

Your eyes couldn't help but trail down into his lap, revealing his flushed erect cock, slick and shiny with his own spit as he stroked it desperately, making his hips jerk forward with every pump of his fist. He was moaning _loud_  too, little desperate whines that made you suck in a sharp breath.

You wanted to say something or at least give him some privacy, but you were frozen, eyes wide and voice caught in your throat. You had not expected it to be such an incredibly arousing sight, and you couldn't help the throbbing heat of pleasure building up in your abdomen.

He nearly yelped when he turned and saw you standing in the doorway, he immediately scrambled to cover himself up, apologizing over and over again, but you saw his cock, and _wow_  the sight of it made your mouth water.

Your tire runs over a small pothole and the jerk of the car makes You snap back to reality, trying to shake the dirty thoughts away, especially when you know that those lingering thoughts of Clyde always bring you back to the same frantic questions you’ve been wondering before.

Its an endless cycle of jumbled thoughts in your head the whole journey back home. you force yourself to not think about Clyde, which _makes_ you think about him, and you find yourself getting caught up in your own fantasies, only to be brought back to heartbreak when you realize that they're not real, leaving a bitter taste in your mouth. Over and over.

You finally get to Emma’s house, parking in the driveway and letting out a deep relieved sigh when you see her practically skipping out of the door to greet you with a big smile on her face.

  
“Hey.” she greets you in a soft voice, she must've been able to tell from the mere expression on your face that you're exhausted.  
Still, she grabs you by your arm and yanks you into a big bear hug, making you chuckle lightly.

“Hey now..” your voice muffled by her tight embrace.

“I haven't seen you in _forever_ , I'm giving you a hug whether you want it or not,” she says, before giving you one last squeeze before she lets you free.

“Come on inside, you must've had a long day.” she smiles, patting your shoulder and ushering you inside.

She helps you carry your bags into her place and you marvel at the interior. Cool blue tones line the walls, accented with light greys and small bits of white. Bold, white tile lines the floor, broken up by dark granite tops, making everything look so _pristine_. This was definitely new.

“Love what you’ve done with the place.” you admire.

“Thank you! I actually hired a designer to do all the interior and I love it. I actually have a guest room!” she jumps excitedly, “ you're gonna be the first person to use it since I've gotten the place done. come on ill show you!.” she says, grabbing your hand and dragging you down the hall.

 

She opens a door to the right, revealing a well-decorated room similar to the same colors and style of the rest of the house. You walk over to set your bags down and sit on the edge of the bed and Emma bounces over to join you.

“So, how are you doing?” she asks, you look over to see worried eyes stare back at you. And you take a moment, you don't really know what to feel, but right now...

“Tired.” you chuckle, pausing, looking down, “confused…”

“Just as I thought, You probably thought yourself to death on the way here,” she remarks,  
smirking.

You send her a small glare, How dare she know you so well.

“Well, for tonight, get some rest. Being cramped in a car all day cant be fun. We can talk in the morning. What are you gonna be doing tomorrow?”

“I’ll probably call Jason again, so we can actually schedule a meeting. I think I need to get a lawyer too….” you trail off when you see Emma’s face of disgust at Jason’s name, “What?” you ask

“I just,” she threw her hands up, “I never liked that man.” and you giggle.

“I know, you never were really quiet about that even when we were _actually_  together,” you respond.

“Hey! I’m just glad you found someone new,” she says, winking at you and laughing.  
You smile fondly at the thought of Clyde, but then get interrupted by a yawn. You look over to the time and you realize its actually getting really late...

“Okay okay ill get out of your hair,” she resigns, giving you one last hug before bouncing up from the bed, leaving the room and giving you a small “Goodnight”.

You get up and get settled into bed, falling asleep the moment your head touched the pillow.

 

You were woken up to the deep aroma of coffee filling your room and in a sleepy daze, you roll over to see Emma inching into your room, smiling.

“Good morning,” she says in a singsong voice.

You couldn't help but mirror that bright smile, sitting up and stretching.

“Mornin’” you mumble, sleep still tugging at your eyelids, “what time is it?”

“ Twelve-ish,” she says as she checks the time. You groan, making her laugh.

“ Hey, you clearly needed the sleep. I'll get some coffee ready for you in the kitchen.,” she promises before leaving, leaving the door slightly ajar.

You nod and thank her, you were surprised at how long you slept. You always wake up early, a habit you’ve had since you moved in with Clyde. He was quite the early riser to your surprise. You had thought that with his schedule at the bar, he would take his time in the mornings, but he's proactive and ready to take on the day. It made you smile, but you always needed to take an extra ten or fifteen minutes.

Your mind drifts, wondering what kind of sleep he must be getting in prison, heartbreak stabbing into your chest when you picture him in alone in a cell, wearing that prison jumpsuit, lying in his bunk, and staring hopelessly at the ceiling.

You sigh and heave yourself out of bed, yawning and rubbing your eyes. When you get to the kitchen, you see a mug set out on the counter for you.

“Didn't really know how much cream and sugar you wanted so I didn't even wanna try.” Emma chuckles before sitting herself on the couch.  
You eventually join her on the couch, sinking into it and sighing, relieved.

“ so we have a lot to talk about. what the plan for today?” she asks, sipping her coffee.  
The question makes you stiffen. You groan.

“Ugh, I don't even know where to start.” you huff out, frustrated. “ Do I need a lawyer? What forms do I need to sign? Where do I even _get_ a lawyer? How long do you think this entire process is gonna take. Like all I know is that there's like a lot of papers I need to sign or something bu-” you're rambling, but you can't stop with a thousand different thoughts racing through your head.

“Hey hey hey HEY.” Emma cuts in, finally getting your attention.

“First off,” she starts. “What you _need_  to do is talk to Jason, face to face. See where you guys are at. Hell, you could change your mind and decide to stay together. It’s been _months_ , Y/N”

The idea of going back to Jason turns your mouth sour, “at this point I’d rather live in West Virginia in a trailer for the rest of my life than go back to him.” you murmur and you hear her snort, but you know she’s right. You're gonna have to face him sooner or later.

“I’m sayin’ anything can happen” she shrugs, “ I know you got someone new but it can't be all _that_  serious. How did you even meet him?” she asks.

“That’s the thing, it _is_ that serious. I went to some random bar on my drive to nowhere after Jason...,” you hesitate, “... y’know, and he was the bartender. I must've looked like hell, because we started talking, and he invited me to stay with him that night.”

Emma just laughs, “oh my god. That's _bold_ ”

You huff, “ not like _that_! I’m saying that when you got a girl who's practically homeless, all wet from the rain, sniffling in the corner of a bar, you’d probably try to help her too.”

She sighs,” well I mean yeah, but whatever he’s clearly not a serial killer so...continue,” she urges you, taking a sip of coffee.

“Ever since then, I've just been staying there. He offered for me to stay with him, work a little at his bar. I couldn't really say no to a deal like that,” you reason hesitantly, “ and after some time passed, y’know, feelings happened.”

“Of course. I’d love to just live rent free with some southern hottie, only workin’ a bit at his bar.” a mischevious smile grows on Emma’s face, “ so like, what does he look like? Is he cute?”

You smile fondly and blush a bit, thinking about Clyde’s adorable grin that makes his eyes sparkle and makes your heart race, “...yeah he is. Real cute.”

“Well?” Emma nudges you, “do have a picture I can see…?”

You pause before looking around for your phone. You have a good amount of pictures with Clyde, but he was never really one for selfies. he didn't use his phone much in general, but he occasionally liked to take pictures of other things, like pretty sunsets, his niece, and every once in a while hed take a picture of you when you weren't looking, to his own admission.

He’d always groan dramatically everytime you asked for a picture with him, but Clyde would eventually trudge over, wrap his arm around you, and give a little shy smile before scurrying off. You loved his small shy smile, but The one in pictures though could never compare to the real thing. That toothy grin he’d flash every time he made a dumb joke. Bright red, and giggling like a little kid. You can't help but brighten up when you see him smile like that

“Oh, wow.” Emma breathes out as she looks at a picture of you two from your phone.

“Right?”

“ I mean…” she hesitates, “he’s not _bad_ looking. But I can't say he’s my type. He must treat you real well though if you decided to stay with him this long.”

You make a face at her reaction and she just chuckles.

“But Who cares what _I_ think.” she says, shrugging, “hell of a lot better than Jason though,” she mumbles into her mug before taking a sip, “So like, did you just say to him you were going back home to get divorced because you're still married? I can't imagine he’d take that well.”

You stay silent, looking down into your coffee. And she peers over to you, suspicious.

“What did you do?” she asks, shooting you daggers.

“I d-didn't really _do_  anything, but he actually, y’know, went out of town.”

“He doesn't even know you left?!” she exclaims, “where the hell did he go?”

“....jail.”  
Emma just stares at you and you can feel her heated gaze on you, but you don't wanna look at her so you look down at the carpet. She lets out a deep sigh and pinches the bridge of her nose, “Y/N, I swear to god…”

“It was a minor offense! No one got hurt!” you try to justify “I mean he’ll be out in..eighty seven days.” you say while checking the date.

She stays silent for a while squinting her eyes, before asking “what did he do?”

You sigh and run your fingers through your hair in frustration, “ he drove his damn car into a gas station store. I don't know how the _hell_  he even did that.”

“Oh,” Emma deflates, shrugging nonchalantly, “that's like nothing. Not like robbery or murder or anything. I mean hell, like 40 percent of the population in America has been in jail at this point. They'll throw you in for anything these days.”

You let out a huff, getting up and leaning your elbows against her counter. “so, yeah that's pretty much up to date on my mess of a life.”

“Hey hey, this is nothing. You'll be fine,” she reassures you, “ I've definitely had some friends who have been in worse situations than _thi_ s. You know what you need to do but you're looking at it as a big picture, just break everything down into steps and you'll get there. This might honestly line up perfectly with when he gets out.”

“ I doubt it. I think I'm gonna have to go to court too. I've never anything like this so I just don't know what to expect. But you're right. I just need to take some time to plan out the steps. Thank you.. wait-” You pause, “ you have _other_ friends?” you ask before breaking out into a smile.

“I will _literally_  kill you.” she threatens, but you know there's no malice in it. She gets up and places her mug on the counter near you and sighs, “ Okay, so they get to it.”

“To what?” you ask.

She tosses your phone at you, and you fumble before you catch it, giving you a stern look,

“ _call Jason_.”

  
~~~  
The call was short and quick like before.

_“I’m back home, we need to speak face to face about this.”_

_“Okay. I'm off for the next couple days so I'm available whenever. Where are you thinking?”_

_“Blue Agave, the place off of Center_ street _. 3 o’clock. Bring whatever we need to get this done.”_

_“...Gotcha.”_

He seems too calm about this. You figured that made sense since he wanted the divorce, hell, he probably already found someone else, like you. You know you shouldn't be so harsh with him, but the anxiety of everything that's been going on has been slowly ripping you apart.

You try to focus on driving to the restaurant, but the deep empty pit in your stomach is clawing its way out and you just want to turn around and go back to West Virginia.

You can't help but pick at your nails at the table as you anxiously wait for Jason to arrive. There aren't too many customers around, yet you feel incredibly claustrophobic, breathing quickly and heart pounding.

You see him walk into the restaurant and you force yourself to take a deep breath. He’s wearing a rather nice button down and some slacks. His hair’s a fluffy mess that he's never been able to completely tame no matter how hard both of you tried. His eyes search the room before he sees you, eyes lighting up before he walks over.  
He sits down and you can _feel_  the tension in the air. Neither of you has said a word and yet-

“How you been?” he asks in that same soft pitiful tone that everyone seems to be using when they talk to you now.

“Fine.” you nod with pursed lips.

“Come on, you gotta work with me here,” he reasons, “I wanna know how you’ve actually been. _Where_  you’ve actually been.”  
You eventually relax, letting your arms down and leaning back in your seat

“ why are you so nervous? It's just me.” he asks innocently.

“I’m just- I don't know. Ever since I lost my job and you told me you wanted a divorce, I've just been trying to run away from everything my life was before. I wanted to start over... I drove for a while and I ended up staying in a small county in West Virginia for a while.”

“West Virginia? What, you hanging out with them country bumpkins.” he jokes in a mocking southern drawl, chuckling at himself.  
You don't know if it has been the ever-growing resentment that's been building up towards this man since the last year of your marriage, but it is like every word coming out of his mouth lights a fire inside you.

“Something like that,” you mumble.

“So, what did you do down in West Virginia?” he asks, raising his eyebrows.

“Just worked for a while, stayed in a nice place with a roommate.”

“Huh,” he nods, “what kind of work you doing there?” the small talk is killing you.

“ just at a bar in Boone County, but can we please just get to starting this... _process_ ” you plead, annoyed.

He just huffs, frustrated. You know you're being difficult, but you just can't stand being in this kind of tense situation.

“ _Hey_ , I miss you.” he pleads, “I want to know how you're doing. Can I at least do that?”

“You know how I'm doing now, I'm fine. I've been fine.”

“C’mon you were a wreck when you left, you couldn't get out of the house quicker and now you're back, ready to get this shit done and over with? Did you miss me at all?” he asks, looking deep into your eyes, begging for the answer you know he wants.

Your hands are shaking, but you take a steady breath, this has to be done.

“I did. For a while. But I realized this time I've spent out there that these past years, our relationship was dying and I was too stupid to notice it. You barely paid attention to me, you've never been able to stay in control of your anger and _I_  had to pay the price.,” you see his relaxed smile grow into a deep angry frown the longer you talked, but you kept going, “I was destroyed when you told me you wanted a divorce, but I realized that this was coming whether I wanted it or not, and I needed to grieve on my own. I found a home somewhere else and honestly, I didn't know how unhappy I truly was with you until I met Clyde and even thou-”

He cuts you off, “Who the _fuck_  is Clyde?” the sharp tone in his voice making you flinch. Your stomach dropped and you couldn't find the words to respond. Oh god. You didn't mean to say Clyde-

“Who. The fuck. Is Clyde.” he stares at you, eyes piercing your very core. You feel like you can't breathe.

“H-he’s a guy I met…” was all you could choke out before he smacked the table hard, making you jump in your seat and the silverware bounce.

“We’re not even divorced yet and you're already fucking other guys?!” he snapped.

“We not _fucking_ Jason, get a grip. He’s just my roommate.”

“He’s your fucking roommate?!” he’s practically yelling and you can see other customers turning their heads.

“Keep your voice down!” you hiss

“Why the fuck would I do that if my fucking wife is already jumping other dudes fuckin pants before the papers are signed. Fuck!” he snarls, shaking, “I can't believe this. You moved on that quick huh?”

There’s silence and you just stare at him, nervous while he tries to process what you told him.

He eventually sighs, staring down at the table “ I wanted to tell you that I wanted you to come home. I wanted to tell you that we could make this work. It still _can_ , Y/N. The time I spent without you was terrible. I felt so lonely and I realized that we can keep trying. This is such a massive decision. even just talking to my lawyer and getting all this paperwork done has been a nightmare... I don't know who this dude is but we can take some marriage counseling sessions, I promise I'll work on the anger. It's been 7 years. We don't have to end this. I was being stupid, but I don't want to let you go”

You sit, thinking. From the moment you left West Virginia to come back, you've been stern about getting your divorce done and over with. You didn't expect him to want to be together again.

“ but you were the one who wanted this is the first place. Deciding that you want to be divorced is a big decision too. My job was gone, my marriage was gone, so I just got up and left. I didn't see the point in staying. I love you-

“I love you too! That’s what I'm saying. We don't have to let this go yet. We can still be happy together. “ the pleading look in his eyes makes you waver for a moment, but you shake it off.

“No no no Jason what I'm _trying_  to say is...this is not gonna work. it hasn't been working. I just didn't realize it because I didn't really know what I wanted out of a relationship. But I know now that I want this divorce. Whatever _this_  is, it's gone too far to go back to fix. I think the only thing we can do now is move on from each other.” you say, firm and final.

He stares at you, fire burning behind his eyes, and he huffs angrily.

“Fine. we’ll get the fuckin’ divorce so you can go live in bumfuck nowhere or something with this fucker” he mumbles angrily, resigning and looking out the window of the restaurant before reaching into his bag.

“ I was hoping I could convince you to stay when you came up, but I didn't expect you to have a boyfriend already so I guess not. Here.” he slides across a packet of papers to you. you grit your teeth at his comments, but just let it slide as he continues,“ I had spoken to my lawyer already and he told me what we need to do. So given that we had signed a prenup before our marriage, this is gonna be a lot easier than I expected. We have no kids so child supports out of the way and this is technically uncontested. So _these_ are for the hearing date.” he says, gesturing to the packet, “ sign the agreement form in there and we’re gonna have to fill out a separation agreement, and set the hearing date. coming to a settlement shouldn't be too hard considering the prenup, so...”

“So..” you echo.

“This is it I guess. You’ve been served,” he says bitterly before sighing, packing his things and getting up to leave. A Part of you, in these last few moments, wants to go back and try again with him. Just to bring things back like they were before. But you know it's for the best for both of you two.

“ I’ll see you in court,” he mumbles before he walks out.

You just sit, frozen. Still trying to take everything in. you want to be sad, feel bad for him. But as you watch him walk out the door, you realize that you don't. The battle isn't over yet, but right now all you want to do now is go home and see Clyde.

~~~

“Why the long face Clyde?”

Clyde looks up from mopping the floor to see joe bang, lying in his hospital bed, smirking.

Exactly where he should be.

“Nothin’” he shrugs off.

“Mmm, I bet,” Joe says sarcastically.

Clyde doesn't respond and just resumes mopping in silence, nervously making note of all the nurses and other prisoners around.  
Joe eyes him, pursing his lips, “you've always been the moody Logan, but _this_  is just out of hand.”

“Can you just mind your damn business joe?” Clyde eventually snaps.

“Oh, so somethin’ _is_  botherin’ you.” he pries, “come on, you can tell me. Don't you trust me?”

Clyde just glares at him.

“Wow,” Joe pouts, “that hurts.”

Clyde just sighs, setting his mop to the side,“ 'm just tired. I didn't expect 90 days to feel _this_  long. I miss sleepin’ in my own bed.”

He thinks of all the cold nights when you both snuggled up together under the blankets, your face buried in his chest while he gives you small kisses on the top of your head, before you both fell asleep. He can't wait to go back to that.

Assuming you're still there.

The sting of guilt sticks with him, but there's not much he can do. Just go forth with the plan and hope he doesn't get caught.

Joe stares at him for a while, narrowing his eyes as if he's trying to read Clyde's mind, which just makes Clyde more aggravated. He turns to go back to mopping, hoping that Joe would just let it go. Let him go back to what he's doing, but to his dismay, he hears Joe cut in.

“Awh, its cause you miss your lil’ hunny at home huh?” he guesses, a cocky grin on his face, which makes Clyde’s small frown deepen, “Jimmy told me you had a lady stayin’ with ya. Cute little thing. She waitin’ for you to get out?”

The question hangs in silence as Clyde just stares down at the ground. He doesn't want to be talking about you, especially not with Joe Bang. the thought of you alone follows him throughout the day and every night before bed, he can't stop wondering where you've gone, or what you think of him now that he’s practically abandoned you.

With every passing thought, the guilt burrows itself deeper into his chest.

“Don't know.” he mumbles, “ I'm just tryin’ to focus on gettin’ this damn thing done and over with... Now I'm _supposed_  to be pretendin’ I don't know ya. So do me favor and just...shush”

Joe just flops around on the bed and groans, “ you're never any fun.”

Clyde just rolls his eyes and looks over at the clock. Only just a little longer till lockdown…

He shuffles back to watch as a nurse walks into Joe’s hospital room, keeping his head down and close to the door, listening to their conversation.

“...Please, ma'am, don't make me use _that thing_..” he hears Joe whine, “ _please_ I’ll walk slow.”

Clyde takes a moment. Showtime.

“Nurse?” he starts with an innocent tone, popping his head into the room and grabbing the nurses attention, “ I can walk him. I’m finished moppin’ floors in here.”

she looks at him with pursed lips, contemplating. He can see her concern in her eyes as she takes his offer into consideration and he tries to give her the most innocent look he could muster. Joe just smirks mischievously from behind her.

After a few moments, She clicks her tongue, “ okay, but take it slow. if he falls and hits his head, that's on _you_.”

He nods with a “ yes, Ma’am.” giving her a shy smile.

She strolls out of the room and Joe pops out of bed with a grin on his face, “Easy enough. Lets bust outta here.”

Clyde just grumbles and follows Joe down the hall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Clyde's tired man lol  
> thank you guys for the comments and kudos! it means a lot ∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿

**Author's Note:**

> come hang out with me on tumblr http://adumbdryer.tumblr.com


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